How To Help A Friend

Acknowledge that he or she is in a very difficult and scary situation.
Let your friend or family member know that the abuse is not their fault. Reassure her that she is not alone and that there is help and support out there.

Be supportive.
Listen to your friend or family member. Remember that it may be difficult for her to talk about the abuse. Let her know that you are available to help whenever she may need it. What she needs most is someone who will believe and listen to her.

Be non-judgmental.
Respect your friend or family member's decisions. There are many reasons why victims stay in abusive relationships. She may leave and return to the relationship many times. Do not criticize her decision or try to guilt her. She will need your support even more during those times.

Encourage her to participate in activities outside of the relationship with friends and family.

If she ends the relationship, continue to be supportive of her.
Even though the relationship was abusive, your friend or family member may still feel sad and lonely once it is over. She will need time to mourn the loss of the relationship and will especially need your support at that time.

Help her to develop a safety plan.

Encourage her to talk to people who can provide help and guidance.
Find a local domestic violence agency that provides counseling or support groups. Offer to go with her to talk to family and friends. If she has to go to the police, court or a lawyer, offer to go along for moral support.

Remember that you cannot "rescue" her.
Although it is difficult to see someone you care about get hurt, ultimately the person getting hurt has to be the one to decide that they want to do something about it. It's important for you to support her and help her find a way to safety and peace.